Category: Blog posts

33

A Lack of Enthusiasm for Teleportation

Recently I went with some friends to a lovely country pub, to eat fish and chips on a Friday night, while the beautiful British summer howled against the window panes and soaked up the...

19

Ash-Matic Did an Exam

28/01 Like a gladiator walking into the colloseum, checking he hasn’t left his sword on the kitchen counter, I went into my exam, checking I hadn’t forgotten a pen. Of course I hadn’t. I...

15

Ash-Matic Did Revision

26/01 Technically, this post chould be called Ash-Matic Does Procrastinating. If Ash-Matic was revising, this post would not exist. But I want to save Ash-Matic Does Procrastinating for another time, because it’s something I’m...

22

Bad Decisions

Last weekend was horrible. Imagine the worst weekend you can imagine. Now stab yourself in the eyeballs while imagining it. That’s almost how bad last weekend was – except the screaming noises coming out...

54

Ash-Matic Does Affection for Animals

Just like most people, I am asked on an almost-daily basis what my favourite animal is. The only questions I am asked with greater frequency are, ‘What made you think that was a good...

36

Ash-Matic Does Whales in the Swimming Pool

A swimming pool is a big pool of liquid in which people swim. They come in many shapes and sizes, and occasionally are filled with non-conventional liquids – just like the swimming pools themselves....

33

Ash-Matic Does Masculine Scratching

There are many differences between the genders. Some of these are obvious – like a pair of lovely boobs – but it’s rude to stare, so we’re all obliged to pretend they’re not that...

38

Ash-Matic Does Good News and Bad News.

The other night I had two pieces of news: One was that the lovely Miss-Matic would be away overnight the next day, due to a work commitment; the other was that our fridge-freezer had...

30

Ash-Matic Does Domestic Discord

Uh oh. I’m in trouble. Miss-Matic has guests. And when Miss-Matic has guests, the laws of chaos seem to inexplicably change. Normally, when I walk into a someone’s home and see an unwashed mug,...